Ladies and Gentlemen, the Next President of the United States of America

This is it!

MSNBC is calling it for Obama after he won the entire West Coast.

I'm gonna go dance in the street now.

Live from the LHP Election Results Center 9

The Flip is in: NM for Obama.

Live from the LHP Election Results Center 8

Fox has called OH for Obama and MSNBC has followed suit.

THIS ONE'S OVER.

Really?!

Fox calls NM for Obama.

Wow.

EDIT: And now they've taken it back.

Double wow.

Live from the LHP Election Results Center 7

Obama: NY, MI, MN, WI
McCain: KS, ND, WY

Too close: AZ (WOO!), TX, CO, LA, NM, NE, SD
Still close: FL, NC, VA, MO, IN, OH

More tips for MSNBC

I know you need to prove you're not TEH LIBROOL for the right-wing talking heads (like they'd care anyhow), but hosting convicted criminal scumbag Tom DeLay does nothing for your rep with sane people.

Thank you.

Live from the LHP Election Results Center 6

I'm starting to worry.

Live from the LHP Election Results Center 5

Mitch Daniels is keeping his seat.

Well, at least I didn't vote for him.

WOOOOO-HOOOO-HOOO-HOOO-HOOO!

MCCAIN'S STRATEGY HAS FAILED!
BARRING A HUGE UPSET, OBAMA IS THE PRESIDENT-ELECT!

Okay, calm, collected... we need Obama to win a Bush state.

Live from the LHP Election Results Center 4

Illinois, PA, NJ, MA, MD, CT, NH for Obama.
TN for McCain.

Think of the Hitchhiker's Guide

When it comes to those states where McCain is ahead, I've heard that there are good reasons to not give up: rural right-wing districts always report in first, and they aren't calling states that McStale should have walked away with.

In short: DON'T PANIC

Live from the LHP Election Results Center 3

NC, OH, and WV closing.

Indiana is slipping away from Obama, unfortunately.

Attention, MSNBC Anchors

Souder is pronounced "SOW-der", not "SO-der", and Steuben has its stress on the last syllable: "Steu-BEN".

You're not from here, so it can be forgiven.

Live from the LHP Election Results Center 2

It looks like Mitch "The Sell-Off" Daniels is going to keep his ill-gotten, ill-used office. Piss.